Pride comes before the fall, a popular and enduring saying popular in the English speaking world. This saying suggests that too much pride will blind one to reality and thus, inevitably, cause a fall.
Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall. --Proverbs 16:18 www.wikipedia.org
When I started this inane rambling of a blog I promised myself that I would remain strictly anonymous. I also promised that I would never reveal the name of Smalltown (although the clues are there in abundance) and that I would certainly protect the identities of the mainly harmless folk that I mercilessly parody. Yesterday I broke all the golden rules. The Digital Queen has returned from vacation and she was in the shop ordering the usual skinny caramel and leaving the usual undeservedly generous tip. For some insane reason I ratted myself out and gave her this blog address, telling her to click on “Coffee and the Digital Queen”. Actually I should come clean here otherwise the title of this entry isn’t going to make sense. I have enjoyed writing this blog and filling the quiet moments in the shop with something more productive than spliffing up or counting the ceiling tiles. I am acutely aware that with the exception of a sweet little girly in Canada (whom I have mortally offended and will never read this nonsense again) and FOTL1 with the occasional visit from FOTL2 , no one actually reads this drivel. So I could not resist the opportunity to increase my readership by 50%.
Well DQ enjoyed “Coffee and the Digital Queen” so much that she took the time to call the shop and let me know. How good do I feel? There you have the pride. Now for the fall.
This morning I am out front cleaning the windows when a car toots its horn. Suppressing an urge to duck and cover (I am still hiding from those bastards at the Samaritans) I turn to see the Digital Queen. She winds down her window and calls out, with that big, big grin “I was up way too late last night reading your blog”. All right, one up for the Coffee Bitch.
Have you ever woken up with a pounding head and that nasty feeling of guilt and remorse? Of course you have, you liar. Well you know how you spend the next several hours trying to relive the night before, knowing that you did something bad but not quite knowing what it was. That was how I felt, just a strange sense of unease and yet the sun was shining, God was in his heaven and the boss was in a good mood, what is wrong? Then it hit me like an ice cube enema, I just froze. Oh dear God this is so bad, I am so screwed. I suddenly realized what it was. DQ was driving a 2007 model 300M. If this doesn’t make sense to you, you should leave now, read “The Coffee Bitch rants” and all will be revealed.
I should probably leave this alone on the basis that when in a hole the best policy is to stop digging but in a pathetic attempt to redeem myself I point out that
a) The Hemi is a nice engine which is why NASCAR use them
b) You are only a moron if you cover it in pointless stickers that say “Yeah its got a hemi”
c) And if you drive at 55mph in the left lane on the interstate.
d) Women who drive them look really really hot.
Oh enough, I think that we all know I have earned my last Lincoln for a skinny.
Yours in abject semi anonymity
TCB
Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall. --Proverbs 16:18 www.wikipedia.org
When I started this inane rambling of a blog I promised myself that I would remain strictly anonymous. I also promised that I would never reveal the name of Smalltown (although the clues are there in abundance) and that I would certainly protect the identities of the mainly harmless folk that I mercilessly parody. Yesterday I broke all the golden rules. The Digital Queen has returned from vacation and she was in the shop ordering the usual skinny caramel and leaving the usual undeservedly generous tip. For some insane reason I ratted myself out and gave her this blog address, telling her to click on “Coffee and the Digital Queen”. Actually I should come clean here otherwise the title of this entry isn’t going to make sense. I have enjoyed writing this blog and filling the quiet moments in the shop with something more productive than spliffing up or counting the ceiling tiles. I am acutely aware that with the exception of a sweet little girly in Canada (whom I have mortally offended and will never read this nonsense again) and FOTL1 with the occasional visit from FOTL2 , no one actually reads this drivel. So I could not resist the opportunity to increase my readership by 50%.
Well DQ enjoyed “Coffee and the Digital Queen” so much that she took the time to call the shop and let me know. How good do I feel? There you have the pride. Now for the fall.
This morning I am out front cleaning the windows when a car toots its horn. Suppressing an urge to duck and cover (I am still hiding from those bastards at the Samaritans) I turn to see the Digital Queen. She winds down her window and calls out, with that big, big grin “I was up way too late last night reading your blog”. All right, one up for the Coffee Bitch.
Have you ever woken up with a pounding head and that nasty feeling of guilt and remorse? Of course you have, you liar. Well you know how you spend the next several hours trying to relive the night before, knowing that you did something bad but not quite knowing what it was. That was how I felt, just a strange sense of unease and yet the sun was shining, God was in his heaven and the boss was in a good mood, what is wrong? Then it hit me like an ice cube enema, I just froze. Oh dear God this is so bad, I am so screwed. I suddenly realized what it was. DQ was driving a 2007 model 300M. If this doesn’t make sense to you, you should leave now, read “The Coffee Bitch rants” and all will be revealed.
I should probably leave this alone on the basis that when in a hole the best policy is to stop digging but in a pathetic attempt to redeem myself I point out that
a) The Hemi is a nice engine which is why NASCAR use them
b) You are only a moron if you cover it in pointless stickers that say “Yeah its got a hemi”
c) And if you drive at 55mph in the left lane on the interstate.
d) Women who drive them look really really hot.
Oh enough, I think that we all know I have earned my last Lincoln for a skinny.
Yours in abject semi anonymity
TCB
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